Can you guess what comic this is from? And yes, this is a regular character from the strip.

According to the President, he uses “the Google” (presumably to search the pipes of the Internets).

We had the furnace guy install a new, more powerful blower. Unfortunately for Tweety, that also meant more powerful suction at the intakes.

(More at This Old House.)

I’ve been meaning to say this for quite a while.

Do you know what the two most profitable industries in the United States are, with “profit” defined as the profit margin — that is, how much more a company makes than it spends?

1. Pharmaceuticals.
2. Newspapers.

Yep, you got that right. With an average profit margin of 20 percent, newspapers as an industry — which includes the dead trees themselves, plus Web sites and other related products put out by the companies — outperform every industry except pharmaceuticals.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that print isn’t on the way out, or that investors aren’t uncertain (this is a measure of profit, not stock price). But it does mean that the people who crow about the imminent demise of newspaper publishers are ranting from someplace other than Factsville.

Just thought I’d mention that.

I found this Nancy panel particularly disturbing.

OK, listen very carefully. (All right, read very carefully.) You aren’t going to believe this.

OJ Simpson is writing a book, tentatively titled, “If I Did It,” in which he describes the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman as if he was there, calling it “hypothetical.”

Courtesy of Scott “Dilbert” Adams:

1. Make a will

2 .Pay off your credit cards

3. Get term life insurance if you have a family to support

4. Fund your 401k to the maximum

5. Fund your IRA to the maximum

6. Buy a house if you want to live in a house and can afford it

7. Put six months worth of expenses in a money-market account

8. Take whatever money is left over and invest 70% in a stock index fund and 30% in a bond fund through any discount broker and never touch it until retirement

9. If any of this confuses you, or you have something special going on (retirement, college planning, tax issues), hire a fee-based financial planner, not one who charges a percentage of your portfolio

Couldn’t agree more. –AK

It’s one of several, actually, that you can read here.

Allegedly the German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They, it is alleged, not only
expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them.

So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control
and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.

Speedbird 206: “Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway.”

Ground: “Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.”

The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.

Ground: “Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?”

Speedbird 206: “Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now.”

Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): “Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?”

Speedbird 206 (coolly): “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark … and I didn’t land.”

1. He’s gone from joke to, um, bigger joke.

At a news conference at an Italian restaurant, Tyson said he would likely go just four rounds [in his upcoming "Mike Tyson's World Tour"] and that future stops on the tour might include bouts with women, possibly professional boxer Ann Wolfe.

[snip]

When asked if he was joking about fighting women, Tyson said, “I’m very serious.”

2. He’s been watching too many episodes of Star Trek: Voyager.

(If you don’t get #2, my apologies.)

Holy moly.

We live in a country where the ultimate consumer is an obese 16-year-old hooked up at one end to a Big Gulp and at the other to a PlayStation.

Read the whole thing.

I note with some amusement the choices YouTube gives you for describing yourself — specifically, the three choices for “Relationship Status.”

And what, pray tell, is meant by “Open”? (Note: Question is rhetorical.) It’s kinda funny that YouTube gives you the option to say that you’re willing to cheat on your S.O.

If the sign reads

General Tso’s “chicken”

beware.

From the Toys ‘R’ Us catalog (”We B Toys” for you in the Chicago area), we have this charming doll.

“Sam, if you’re not good Daddy’s going to put Mad Molly under your bed….”

Here’s something to file under “I didn’t know that.”

Walgreens corporate policy allows its pharmacists to refuse to dispense birth-control prescriptions. Target and Winn-Dixie apparently have similar policies.

We’re not talking RU-486, we’re not talking and we’re not talking about Plan B. We’re talking about The Pill — you know, the thing that’s been around since 1960.

And unlike other pharmacies, which require their pharmacists to either get someone else on staff to fill the script (or at least point you to an alternative source), Walgreens pharmacists can simply hand it back to you — presumably with a prayer for your soul, for daring to try to exercise your legal and ethical right to decide whether to have children.

More importantly, it would seem this policy opens the door for Walgreens pharmacists to refuse to fill any prescription. Would a Scientologist refuse to dispense Zoloft? Would a Christian Scientist refuse to give you Cephalexin? Will you have trouble getting Ritalin for your kid?

Valid questions, I think.

Note: Austin, Texas, bans this practice. Pharmacists there have to fill scripts whether their particular scripture likes it or not.

Update: If you think I’m overreacting, read this story.

The saddest thing you’re likely to see today. Seriously.